Confession

Confession: You always hear of kids who climb into their parents bed when they can't sleep or after a bad dream. 

Well, sometimes I do that. 

But not in my parents bed-- thank goodness!-- but in my little B's bed. He is the snuggliest, squishiest little boy ever. 

So on those nights when I just can't sleep or when my mind is racing with all of my anxieties and fears or sometimes after having a bad dream I will quietly sneak out of my room and tip toe into my boys room. I will kiss SJ on the forehead or cheek --he is the least snugly  boy and I learned early on that he needs his space to sleep, which he gets from his momma-- after I give SJ a kiss I climb into B's bed. Even in his sleep he will sense I'm there and scootch as close as he can to me and then he will wrap his little boy chubby arm around my neck.

Within seconds my whole being feels restored and my fears are calmed. I will lay there for a while just watching him sleep and listening to him breath and then sneak back into my bed --remember I need my space to actually sleep-- and fall quickly asleep.

I don't know at what age he will no longer let me do this but for now I soak up every squishy, snuggly second of it. He has no idea what a powerful and calming effect he has on his momma.

And on the rare nights when the tables are turned and I hear that sweet little boy beside my bed whispering "mommy, I had a bad dream" I happily return the favor. I let him climb next to me and rub his back or hold his hand until I hear his breath slow and deepen with sleep. Then I wake up my husband and make him carry B back to his bed so I can get some sleep.

These are moments and memories that I cherish. There is just something addicting about watching your baby sleep.

Am I the only one who does this? Or are there any other moms out there who do this when they can't sleep?